Authentic Friendship

Here is this morning's sermon. You can listen here.

Here are the notes and a study guide:

We all want to be known as influential, successful, or something else we see as impressive. In fact, we spend a lot of time and energy projecting an image of ourselves that we think will gain us acceptance from others. But this isn't who we really are, and if we aren't careful, we'll end up going through life without being truly known by anyone. And this will rob us of ever knowing true acceptance.

There are not many things in life so beautiful as true friendship, and not many things more uncommon.

One of the things we need most in life is to be known and accepted by somebodies for exactly who we are and then loved by those persons too much to leave us that way.

Questions to consider

What do you really want to be known for?
How are you practicing image management?

Authenticity

Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results. –James 5:16

Friendship is one mind in two bodies. -Mencius

Application questions

Do you let anyone know about your struggles?
Is there anyone who truly knows you and can accurately pray for you?

Encouragement

Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works. And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near. -Hebrews 10:24-25.

The most I can do for my friend is simply to be his friend. I have no wealth to bestow on him. If he knows that I am happy in loving him, he will want no other reward. Is not friendship divine in this? -Henry David Thoreau

Application questions

How can we encourage each other?
How can we push each other to deal with the shortcomings we try to hide?

Faithfulness

Dear brothers and sisters, if another believer is overcome by some sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person back onto the right path. And be careful not to fall into the same temptation yourself. Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ. If you think you are too important to help someone, you are only fooling yourself. You are not that important. -Galatians 6:1-3.

Friends are like pillars on your porch. Sometimes they hold you up and sometimes they lean on you.

Application questions

What does it look like to be "gentle" with each other's shortcomings?
How can we carry each other's burdens, those things that we shouldn't carry alone?

Acceptance

Accept other believers who are weak in faith, and don’t argue with them about what they think is right or wrong. –Romans 14:1

Therefore, accept each other just as Christ has accepted you so that God will be given glory. -Romans 15:7.

A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are.

Application Question

How can we do a better job of accepting people where they are and then helping them grow into who they need to be?

THINK ABOUT IT

How do you fill in the gaps between the person you project to others and who you really are?

Do you give partial information or stretch the truth or bring up your successes every chance you get?

Watch yourself this week and look for signs of image management

How can you be more transparent and how can you make your real self known to others?

See also:

A wonder little book "The Way to Love" by Anthony de Mello
A sermon "Doing Life" by Andy Stanley
An excellent small group resource is ReGroup by Cloud and Townsend